


Learning What You Want (The Hard Way)

by elleavantemm



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, F/F, F/M, First Time, Genderbending, Get Together, Jealousy, Post-Series, Preventers, female!Duo, female!Heero
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-12
Updated: 2012-08-12
Packaged: 2017-11-11 23:46:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/484234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elleavantemm/pseuds/elleavantemm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Finding Heero Yuy standing in her small apartment kitchen in the morning was not something Duo had ever imagined happening. It wasn’t something she had ever considered wanting, until there it was.</p><p>1x2 genderbend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Learning What You Want (The Hard Way)

**Author's Note:**

> I owe so much thanks to my friend/beta/shoulder-to-cry-on/hand holder, seriesofnonsequiturs for her help with this. She encouraged me from the start and prodded me along the way. This has been sitting in my WIP folder for too long, and I'm glad that it is finally complete.

It had been a team building exercise. Or... something; Duo had a hard time remembering anything before they arrived at Chuck’s, the pub a few blocks from the Preventers’ headquarters owned by a retired cop. It was the prefered after-work haunt by most of the Preventers agents, and Chuck had quickly become a close friend through the bond of being a law enforcement officer, police or otherwise. Upon arriving, Trowa, Quatre, Wufei, Heero, and Duo had all slipped into their usual booth and ordered a round of shots. Exhaustion mixed with alcohol resulted in quickly lowered inhibitions. Despite their being adults, someone suggested playing Truth-or-Dare; the others too drunk to veto the suggestion, eagerly agreed.

Which is how Duo found herself making out with Heero, crammed in the cracked vinyl booth between Trowa and Wufei. It turned out that Heero was a hell of a kisser. 

Duo never really considered the possibility that she might be into girls. She’d dated men her entire life; and while she found other women attractive from time to time, there was nothing sexual behind it, merely an appreciation for the beauty of the female form. Yet sitting in that booth, flushed from the alcohol and the heat of her coworkers’ bodies, Heero’s tongue confident and demanding in her mouth, she felt a surge of arousal settle low in her stomach. Heero’s fingers were working their way beneath the hem of Duo’s t-shirt, and if they didn’t stop now, things were going to get really inappropriate in record time. Reluctantly, Duo pulled away, blinking slowly and licking her lips. 

Heero’s mouth, usually a soft pink, was deep red. Her bottom lip, slightly swollen from pressure and teeth, held Duo’s gaze, and it took serious resolve for her to look away, lifting the shot glass to her mouth. Just about everyone at the table was breathing hard. Duo recognized the glazed look of arousal in Trowa’s eyes -- not long since she’d seen it on a regular basis. She was thankful that their brief relationship had ended amicably, happy that Trowa and Quatre had finally admitted there was a spark between them. 

“Whose turn is it?” Duo slurred, hiccuping. 

Quatre swallowed and adjusted the barrette in her hair. “I think it’s Wufei’s turn.”

The man in question was blinking blearily into his cup, glasses slipping down his nose. “I think it’s time we settle our debt and head out.” Trowa looked down at his watch. “It’s almost closing time anyway.”

The five agents maneuvered themselves out of the booth and helped one another stumble to the bar where Chuck had their bill ready. Five plastic cards slid across the sticky bar top, and Chuck ran them through. He made each of them drink a glass of water before they left, making sure that those who needed cabs home had one. “The last thing I need is to see your name in the obits because you thought you could drive yourself home.” He did this for each and every one of his patrons; it seemed impossible that he would be capable, but he never failed to make sure that people got home safe. 

Duo shared a cab with Heero and Wufei, as they all lived in the same general vicinity. They dropped Wufei off first, Heero waiting in the cab while Duo ensured that Wufei made it safely to his bed, a glass of water and some pain killers on the nightstand for the morning. When she slipped back into the cab, Heero slid over and rested her head on Duo’s shoulder, followed by her hand on Duo’s knee.

At Duo’s apartment building, Heero got out of the cab as well, paying the cabbie and standing awkwardly on the sidewalk with Duo as it pulled away. “Uh...” Duo said, confused. She tugged at the end of her braid, a nervous habit. “Do you want to come up?”

“Yeah,” Heero replied, and her voice was soft, oddly breathless. 

Duo lived on the third floor of a five storey walk-up. The two women climbed the stairs carefully, Heero close on Duo’s heels. Only when she was drunk or carrying groceries did Duo wish that the building had an elevator; or in the more pressing situation of getting someone up to her apartment. When they reached the door, they both heaved a heavy sigh. Heero leaned against the door jamb as Duo slid her key into the lock of C7. Duo was not expecting Heero’s kiss when the door swung shut behind them. The other woman pressed their mouths together eagerly, her wandering fingers from earlier finding their place beneath the hem of Duo’s t-shirt and exploring without care.

Heero’s kisses left Duo feeling breathless. Her tongue was clever and demanding, but not hurried. She alternated between sucking and biting Duo’s lips, trailing wet kisses down Duo’s neck, and eventually lower, between her small breasts when the t-shirt became a frustrating obstacle that was quickly removed. “Heero,” Duo moaned quietly as the other woman licked and sucked at a nipple. Despite the small size of Duo’s breasts, her nipples were large and immensely sensitive. 

“Do you like that?” Heero asked. She looked up at Duo, dark blue eyes obstructed by the messy fall of her hair. 

“Yeah,” Duo responded, carding her fingers through Heero’s thick bangs, pulling it back from her face. They shared a smile. As Heero sucked and nipped at Duo’s other nipple, wringing another quiet moan, Duo said very quietly, “I’ve never done this before.”

Heero paused, then pulled away completely. “You’ve never been with a woman?” Duo shook her head, embarrassed. “Do you want me to stop?” Duo shook her head again, a soft pink colouring her cheeks. Heero sat back on her heels, looking at up the other woman. “We don’t have to do anything more than you’re comfortable with. If you want me to stop, I’ll stop. And don’t feel like you have to reciprocate. I don’t want you to feel like you have to do anything for me if you aren’t comfortable.”

Duo’s breath felt caught up in her chest, and she nodded. Considering how much they’d had to drink, Duo was impressed that Heero had the presence of mind to have this conversation. Then again, Duo thought, perhaps she’d been in situations like this before. “Duo, breathe,” Heero said, and just like that, all the air rushed out of Duo’s lungs. “Which way to the bedroom?”

It was kind of amazing, being with Heero. She was slow in her discovery, working Duo up and then letting her hang as she moved on to another location, tracing dips and curves, scars and freckles with gentle touches that set Duo’s skin alight. Trowa had never been like this in bed. Or maybe he had been, in the beginning; but once he’d learned the places that got Duo off the fastest, their sexual encounters were pretty cut and dry. It might have been one of the factors that lead to their relationships end. Heero pulled a low moan from Duo as she scraped her teeth across Duo’s ribs. Duo hadn’t even known she was sensitive there. She could feel the grin pulling at Heero’s mouth against her skin. 

Heero brought Duo to orgasm with her fingers, bringing herself off as Duo lay limp and sated on the rumpled sheets. She lay down next to Duo, curling in against her side, fingers idly stroking the end of Duo’s braid as they fell asleep.

+++

Duo woke to an empty bed and a pounding headache. She was surprised, as she rolled over, to find a glass of ice water and two tablets sitting on the nightstand. The cold water was like manna, immediately helping to ease the throbbing behind her eyes. She downed the tablets and stood shakily. She found her panties discarded on the floor and pulled them on, forgoing a shirt as she normally did.

Finding Heero Yuy standing in her small apartment kitchen in the morning was not something Duo had ever imagined happening. It wasn’t something she had ever considered wanting, until there it was. Heero had pulled Duo’s discarded t-shirt on, the threadbare garment barely reaching the full swell of her hips. She had a yellow cotton thong on, the colour vibrant against the pale tan of her skin. A rush of saliva flooded Duo’s mouth as she watched the other woman move about her kitchen. Duo’s shirt rode up as Heero reached into the cupboard above the stove for a canister of coffee. The pungent aroma of ground beans pulled Duo from her position against the door jamb and she stepped in behind her friend and co-worker, slipping her arms around Heero’s waist, breathing in the warm smell of dried sweat and musty sleep. “Morning,” she mumbled against her shoulder.

“Morning,” Heero replied, a smile in her voice.

“You look really good wearing my clothes.”

“Is that so?” Heero returned.

“Mm...” Duo rubbed her cheek against Heero’s shoulder. “Maybe we can talk about getting you out of them. But first... coffee.” 

While the coffee maker bubbled and burped, Heero and Duo stood in the kitchen trading lazy morning kisses. Heero twisted her fingers in the loose strands of hair around Duo’s face, tucking them back behind her ear as she stroked down the length of the auburn braid. It was so comfortable, so normal; as though standing in the kitchen trading lazy morning kitchens was something they did every day. 

As the coffee maker gurgled one last time, Duo suddenly wanted to just look at Heero. Wanted to pull of that t-shirt with no sexual intention, just so that she could see. The thought was put momentarily on hold as Heero pressed a hot mug between Duo’s fingers. No need to ask how she took it; working together allowed for the overlooking of such social transactions. Yet as Duo sipped at her coffee, her eyes never stopped looking; she took in the curve of Heero’s wide hips and narrow waist; she examined the toned muscles of Heero’s thighs, the tightness of her calves, and her slim, delicate ankles. A strange mix of hard and soft. Even Heero’s face demonstrated the unusual dichotomy. She wore her hair cut short, almost a boyish, and yet it didn’t masculinize her face in anyway, rather emphasizing the sharp line of her jaw, the straight nose; features that gave her a serious, commanding appearance. Her eyes were the very same; framed by a fan of thick, dark lashes, she was soft and hard at the same time, her gaze easily capable of being bone chillingly terrifying and heart meltingly warm. 

“How’s your coffee?” Heero asked, and Duo came back to herself abruptly.

“Huh?” Heero hid her smile behind her mug. “Sorry. I guess my mind wandered.”

“You were staring.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Heero set her coffee cup down on the counter, crossing the short distance to remove Duo’s cup, setting it down as well. Duo’s eyes held Heero’s for several seconds before dropping away. “What were you thinking about?” 

Duo swallowed thickly, sucking on her teeth before she answered, barely more than a whisper. “I just want to look.”

“What was that?” Heero asked, but it was obvious she had heard; impossible not to.

“I just want to look,” Duo repeated with more confidence. Heero smiled, hands gripping the hem of the t-shirt. She raised an eyebrow and Duo nodded. The shirt went up and over, landing on the floor without a sound. Heero stepped back and stretched her arms out. 

Her breasts were small; bigger than Duo’s, but not terribly large. They hung slightly to the side, though still firm. Her nipples were small, perhaps no larger than quarter, and were a deep mocha brown. They tightened in the cool air of the apartment. The lines of Heero’s abdomen were defined but not overly toned. Duo was surprised to note that Heero was an outie, not an innie, and was struck with an insatiable desire to press her tongue against the other woman’s navel. “Can I touch?” she asked, tentative.

“Of course.”

That Heero was so comfortable in her body made Duo feel horribly jealous. She was incredibly self-conscious about her own body; narrow hips like a boy, flat chest, wide eyes, and masculine features. Duo traced her fingers along Heero’s collarbone and down to cup her breasts. They were warm, heavy in her hands, filling her palms easily. Heero’s eyes closed and she sighed as Duo traced her thumb around the edge of her areola before rubbing at the stiffened nub. Her hands fell away, skirting down Heero’s flank to trace across her abdomen, following the dips with her fingers, lingering on the tough ridges of scar tissue that marred the skin here and there. 

“Duo,” Heero said abruptly, fingers wrapping around the other woman’s wrist. 

“Did I do something wrong?”

Heero’s pupils were wide and she let out a heavy breath. “Absolutely not.” She directed Duo’s hands inside her underwear. Duo’s fingers were tentative, and she was surprised to discover how wet Heero was. The slick covered her fingertips as she pressed them between the folds of her pussy, skipping over her clit, Heero’s hips jolting forward erratically. Duo did it again, smirking when Heero’s hips jolted forward once more, her arm shooting back to brace against the counter. “Fuck.”

Duo decided to do what she liked doing to herself, running her fingers over Heero’s clit a few more times before slipping two fingers inside. Heero’s head fell forward, breath coming hard as Duo pulled her fingers out and pressed them back in. It was different, working from this angle, but still familiar. She pressed her fingers deeper and curled them, watching in fascination as Heero clutched at the counter, hips hitching forward slightly against the steady motion. “Ahh...!” There was a rush of pressure against Duo’s fingers and Heero sagged back on her arms. Duo let her fingers trace across Heero’s clit a few times as she withdrew her fingers, the other woman whimpering. 

She wasn’t sure what to do about her slick fingers. She picked up the discarded t-shirt and wiped them off, tossing the garment somewhere in the general direction of the bedroom. Heero’s eyes were heavy lidded, blinking lazily when Duo stepped into her personal space, drawing feather soft touches across her hips and abdomen, tugging playfully at a nipple before she kissed her. There was more heat behind the press of lips, Heero’s fingers finding their way to Duo’s sensitive nipples and stroking and tugging until Duo’s breath was harsh and uneven against her mouth. 

After spending the morning in bed - coffee and breakfast abandoned in favour of heated kisses and orgasms - Heero slipped back into her clothes, offering Duo a hard-pressed look as the other woman lounging naked on the bed. “Are you sure you need to go?” Duo asked.

“Yes,” Heero said with determination, leaning down to press a kiss against Duo’s mouth. Heero was quick to pull away, the temptation to deepen the kiss and sink back into bed was too easy to succumb to. “Are you going to see me out?”

Duo slipped from the bed and pulled on a pair of loose-fitting pajama pants and a tank top. “I have some sense of decency,” she joked while Heero rolled her eyes. At the door the shared another slow lingering kiss before Heero pulled away and opened the door. “See you at the office on Monday,” Duo said, leaning against the door as Heero walked towards the staircase. She tossed a wink and a wave over her shoulder, disappearing behind the door as Duo let it swing shut.

+++

Heero being in Duo’s kitchen in the early hours of the morning quickly became a regular occurrence. While not completely comfortable with all the trappings of sex with a woman, adjusting to a new type of body, and to a different set of expectations between the sheets, Duo’s confidence was building, and Heero was incredibly patient. She was content with kisses and fingers, bringing toys they could play with; more content with being with Duo than concerned about the sex. When Duo stumbled into the kitchen one morning a few weeks after their first night together, it was to find Heero mostly dressed for work, a cup of coffee held between her palms as she paged through the newspaper.

Her Preventers shirt was slung over her shoulders, not yet buttoned, and Duo admired the swell of Heero’s breasts against the satin of her bra; she watched the slow rise and fall of Heero’s chest as she breathed. It was oddly intimate. “If you’ve finished staring, I recommend that you hurry up and get dressed. Got a call from the Commander about twenty minutes ago.”

“Why didn’t you wake me up?” Duo asked.

“Can’t you be ready in under half an hour?”

“Fuck you, Yuy,” Duo said, punching her partner’s arm as she ducked into the bathroom. 

When Duo emerged twenty minutes later, slightly damp, but otherwise ready to face the day, Heero had a coffee ready to go and a breakfast sandwich wrapped in a napkin. “You cooked for me?”

“Please. It’s for my own sake, since I know how grouchy you get when you don’t eat.” Heero patted Duo’s ass. “Now hurry up so we can go!”

It was interesting to Duo the way that the sex had done nothing to alter their working relationship. It was partly because the nature of their job forced them to keep a clear head - any distractions could lead to someone getting injured or worse. Duo couldn’t figure out the other reasoning, she just knew that she liked the arrangement that she and Heero had. The only problem was... 

Near end-of-day on a Thursday, one of the lower ranking officers - a lower ranking male officer - stopped Duo outside her office and asked her out for dinner and drinks. It was blatantly obvious that it was a date situation and Duo found she didn’t know what to say. She and Heero hadn’t talked about this at all: were they exclusive? Where they girlfriends? If Duo said yes, would she be cheating? In the end, after a lengthy and awkward pause, Duo asked if she could check her calendar, and assured him that she wasn’t saying no. Free to enter her office, she was relieved to see Heero lounging in one of the chairs opposite the desk. She smiled wide at Duo as she closed the door, though it slipped when she saw the distressed look on Duo’s face. “What’s wrong?”

“I. Uh... what are we doing, exactly?”

“Sitting in my office? Although I sense that isn’t what you’re asking.”

“This.” Duo indicated the space between them. “What are _we_ doing? What are we to each other?”

“Friends and co-workers?”

Duo pushed a hand through her heavy bangs and sighed. “So you wouldn’t be mad or jealous if I said yes to dinner and drinks with someone else?”

The question gave Heero pause. She wanted to say no, of course she wouldn’t, because that seemed as though that was what Duo wanted to hear. Except that Heero liked what they had going, and the idea of that ending or being obstructed by another person didn’t exactly make her happy. “Heero?” Duo sunk down to her knees in front of the other woman. 

“Do you want to say yes?” Heero asked.

“I-- no.”

“Then say no.” It seemed like an easy resolution.

Duo frowned. “What if I wanted to say yes?”

“I don’t know what you want me to say, Duo.”

“Yes you do. I want you to tell me that yes, you’d be jealous, because you have real feelings for me. Or I want you to tell me no, that you don’t care, that our situation is casual, that we’re just fuck buddies or something.” Duo sighed. “I want to know that when people ask me out on a date, that I can say, ‘No, I’m sorry. I’m seeing someone.’”

A pinched look came to Heero’s face and she pushed away from her desk, standing abruptly. “You can tell people what ever you want to tell them, Duo. No one would know if you were lying.”

“Fine.”

Heero’s office door swung shut with a heavy finality, as Duo returned to her own office to collect her coat and bag before finding the young officer, named Nathaniel, to confirm their date. His smile was wide and pleased when she said yes, and it made Duo feel as though she had made the right decision.

+++

Three days later, Duo and Heero sat next to one another at the conference table while Une gave them the overview of the weeks assignments. Heero’s posture was stiff, leaning subtly away from Duo, and she tapped her pen on the table incessantly. “Can you please stop?” Duo snapped, slapping her hand down over the instrument and offering the other woman a glare.

“How was your _date_?” Heero returned, pulling the pen from beneath Duo’s hand and slipping it into her day planner. Duo didn’t miss the bitter emphasis on the word date.

“It was great. Nathaniel is a really nice guy. In fact, we’re going out again this week.”

“How nice.” A muscle in Heero’s jaw pulsed, and Duo could see the way the other woman clenched her teeth.

Duo wasn’t trying to make Heero jealous, but her partner and friend was acting like a petulant child, and Duo couldn’t help but needle her. “And the sex...” Duo smiled wide and made an exaggerated motion with her hands. She and Nathaniel hadn’t had sex, despite the fact that he was obviously interested in introducing a sexual component to their relationship. 

“I’d really rather not,” Heero said, and she sucked hard on her teeth, arms folded across her chest.

“Are the two of you quite finished?” Une asked from the head of the room, and several sets of eyes swung around to look at them.

“Sorry, Commander,” Duo said. 

A short while later, Une dismissed them, and as they exited the conference room, Duo grabbed Heero’s elbow. “Hey, can I talk to you quickly?” Heero nodded tightly and the slipped into an empty office just down the hall. Heero’s arms remained crossed over her chest as she waited for Duo to speak; but rather than words, she was faced with Duo pressing soft, familiar lips against her own, coaxing them open. Heero didn’t even bother to resist, dropping her day planner to the desktop and holding slim hips between her palms. 

“Okay?” Duo asked as she pulled away. 

“Okay.”

“Okay, I want you to know that I am not actually going out with Nathaniel again.”

“But you said--”

“I know what I said.” Duo smiled. “These last few days have had me all messed up without having you making me coffee in the kitchen first thing in the morning and ushering me out of the apartment on time.”

Heero smirked. “I didn’t really want you to go out with Nathaniel.”

Duo threw up her hands in frustration, shaking Heero by her shoulders. “Then why did you let me?”

“Because I was afraid.”

“Afraid?” A deep furrow formed between Duo’s brows. “Afraid of what?”

Heero sighed heavily and sat down in the desk chair, looking up at the other woman plaintively. “Afraid to admit that I liked you. That I wanted to be... exclusive.”

The entire situation is almost hilariously like something from some teenage soap opera, and Duo barely contains the laugh that bubbles up in her throat. “You are the most infuriating person I have ever had the pleasure to know.”

The office door opened, and the officer to whom it belonged looked surprised to find someone else inside. “We’re sorry,” Heero said, rising. “It was empty, and we just needed a place to talk. We’ll leave.”

They stood awkwardly outside in the hall, the rest of the world continuing to turn around them. “Come over tonight,” Duo said. 

“Ok.”

+++

Duo paced in her living room while she waited for Heero to arrive. She was almost afraid that the other woman wouldn’t and then an increasingly awkward work situation would only get worse. Une would not be impressed if Duo showed up in her office asking for a partner reassignment. The tentative knock on the door caught Duo off guard, though she’d been waiting for it, and she hastened to open the door.

Heero stood on the other side dressed in a simple red t-shirt and a pair of fitted blue jeans. She looked amazing, if only for the reason that her presence had been sorely missed in the apartment. “I’m glad you came,” Duo said, stepping aside to let Heero enter. 

“I didn’t mean to be so late. I just... I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologise.”

Heero huffed out a soft laugh. “Sure I do. We wouldn’t be in this situation if I’d just be upfront with you about _Nathaniel_.”

Duo rolled her eyes. “Do you have to say his name like that?”

“It’s be preferable if I never had to say his name again, to be honest.”

“You really don’t like him.”

Crossing her arms defensively, “I really don’t,” Heero replied in a petulant tone.

Duo was suddenly awash with affection for the other woman and pulled her into the circle of her arms. She waited pointedly for Heero to drop her arms before kissing her softly. Heero sighed and leaned into press of lips, fingers tugging gently at the end of Duo’s braid. “I want to do something for you,” Duo breathed against Heero’s cheek. 

Her fingers worked on the button of Heero’s jeans, sliding the fabric down over full hips. “Foot,” she said softly, and Heero lifted one foot and then the other as requested. 

“What are you doing?” Heero asked, brows pulled together in confusion, though she smiled.

“Just wait.” When Duo bent to kneel on the floor, fingers hooking in the waist of Heero’s panties, the confusion melted to surprise. 

“Duo... you don’t--”

“Shh... I want to.” This had been one of the few things that Duo had been reluctant to do in the bedroom; but here and now, it was all she could think about. She wanted Heero above her, gasping and moaning as Duo brought her to climax with her tongue. The plain cotton panties were discarded with the denim, and Duo patted the counter just behind Heero with her hand. “Up.” 

It would be so much easier to take this to the bedroom; to have Heero Yuy, Preventers agent extraordinaire, saviour of both the earth and the colonies, stretched out over the bedsheets, falling to pieces through the work of Duo Maxwell; but Duo loved Heero in her kitchen, for whatever deeply seated subconscious reason. Shouldering her way between Heero’s already spread thighs. The soft sigh Heero released at the first touch of Duo’s tongue was intoxicating. 

Duo worked slow and methodically, ignoring the way that Heero cursed and writhed, demanding more, faster; Duo was determined to do this on her own terms. Heero’s slick spread across the sharpness of Duo’s chin, shining on her cheeks she she came with a shout and a violent shudder, smacking her hand down painfully on the formica countertop. Duo sat back on her heels, grinning up at the other woman with smug satisfaction. Heero slipped off the counter, holding tightly to the edge. Her chest rose and fell as tried to regain her breath. “Bedroom. Now.”

She’d been trepidatious initially, being with Heero. Yet here and now, between her friend - no, her girlfriend’s - knees, she was almost glad that Heero had told her to accept Nathaniel’s invitation for a date. If anything, it made Duo realise that she cared about Heero, that she didn’t care about being with a woman, and that she sure as hell didn’t want anyone else.

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally supposed to be a m/m PWP, but then series suggested that I write it as a genderbend, and I thought that was a great idea, and then all this plot climbed in and here we are.


End file.
